(You can read the cliff notes version here: on my original Instagram post – This is the extended directors cut version.)
To be honest, the story of how I started my art Instagram @nsgbubbleletters (also lovingly referred to as nsg) really isn’t that exciting. I was bored and feeling too comfortable and yet unsettled in my life.
The summer of 2021 was about to start, and I was struggling (like us all) in the middle of the pandemic. I was living under lockdown restrictions and had a limited social life. On top of this my 9-5 work had come to a standstill due to company-wide tech reconfiguration. I was without a work laptop for weeks and only able to do the bare bones of work. It felt like most of the day I was twiddling my thumbs waiting for somebody to tell me to do something.
During this time, the narrative I was often seeing on my social feeds was people being overworked, burnt out, doing the most, doing it all, and trying to juggle a million things. Meanwhile, I was having the opposite problem. I had so many hours in the day to fill and wasn't really doing anything substantial or exciting or meaningful.
I was also feeling unfulfilled and not productive. I wasn't being challenged at my job because of the slowed work flow. Then after work I just spent way too much time scrolling on Instagram and that dang clock app (TikTok) for hours on end. The last time I had worked on something creative was November 2020 when I was stress crocheting a sweater to survive the presidential election and level 5 Covid-19 lockdown in Ireland on top of intense period cramps.
The days were blending together. My brain was feeling underdeveloped. I had an abundance of time on my hands, nowhere to go, and anxious energy bottling up.
Day after day after day after day
and then one day
it got to be too much.
or rather not enough.
I began to really think of ways to better use my time and how I could start challenging my brain again.
Online classes? Tiktok? Blog? Side hustle? Passion project? New hobby?
I thought about how when I was working at full capacity at my 9-5 job and sitting in meetings, I would often write words and phrases from the meeting or phrases just stuck in my mind in kind of shitty (read: not so great) bubble letters. Rather than doodling pictures, I doodled words. It was my way of sketching. I rapidly started piecing together the idea of creating an art page where I could create bubble letters. Writing letters really shittily was something I was already doing and doing often, so I thought why not just make this a bonafide 'thing'. I decided to take this silly thing and run with it. Cue the montage of me brainstorming, planning, and thinking through some minor logistics (aka googling a bunch of ish) and BAM! Three hours later I had created a business Instagram account and launched not just Not so Great Bubble Letters (@nsgbubbleletters) but also myself into the journey of starting an art space for myself.
okay but WHY art? Why start this journey? How do you think filling your time with letters is going to make you feel better or be worthwhile? Why an Instagram page? Why? How? And once again w h y?
The why of it all can be broken down into five main areas.
One.
I have no formal background or education in art. I had been in occasional art classes throughout my childhood and took one art class in. high school. That’s as far as my art education goes. However, I have always had an interest in artistic and creative projects. I like to write. I’ve done some knitting and crocheted a sweater. I love getting wrapped up in a crafty project. like creating. But my output for art and artistic activities felt so low compared to how much I wanted to contribute and create. I often feel I don't have the right or qualifications to deem myself an artist but rather I like to do art. My hope is that by dedicating space to explore this side of me, this little page can help me work towards feeling more confident and involved in that title/identifier.
Two.
Usually, I like to do my research and have all the right / best gear before embarking on something. This desire for perfection and preparedness has often stopped me from doing things I want to do. When starting my page and thinking about my first post/launch/debut another version of myself would have made many drafts and tried to make it look nicer but the whole point of the nsg account is for things to just be as they are and not so refined.
With this creating project, I literally just need a pen and paper. Not even nice paper or a good pen. No excuses. I can easily do this from anywhere and everywhere and I like that. It challenges my usual habits of wanting to over-prepare and to have the best of the best. It simplifies the whole process so I can just focus on creating and having fun.
Three.
This is also why I chose to start this journey on a separate Instagram page for my art. During this period of my life (and even now) I wanted a different way to engage with social media. To think less about likes and comments and how things looked on a feed. It was the easiest and simplest way for me to just start creating and sharing what I was creating. I’ve filled my page with people whose work inspires me or makes me feel good. It’s a space that I enjoy and gives me energy rather than sucks out energy from me and causes me to doom scroll like my usual Instagram account can. I didn't want it to fuel the toxic and dependent relationship I already was experiencing with my phone and social media. Instead of continuously consuming other people's content and opinions and feeds, I wanted to be producing. I wanted to fuel myself with my own creativity. My focus can just be on creating and having fun. It was the easiest and simplest way for me to just start creating and sharing what I was creating. It’s helped me think more about how I want to use social media and how I want to incorporate it and keep boundaries with me in my life. Additionally, it has helped me see how I may want to expand and use social media to find a community within the art space too. Instagram was a way to get started, a launching off point where I can now explore more long-form ways of sharing and talking about art (like this blog and maybe a YouTube channel, a newsletter, etc.).
Four.
I wanted to upskill myself a bit. Because of the pandemic and the pause in my 9-5 work, I felt like I was not getting as much work experience as I normally would in my job. Looking back on my life, there have also been so many times when I’ve had extra untapped time on my hands and wanted to take on a new skill – learning a new language, photography, video editing, a musical instrument – but I never end up doing the thing. Once again, I had sat around waiting to be given permission or be told to do it rather than giving myself the permission to do it. I just wanted to become a better artist. I wanted the confidence and ability to draw things or create things on paper or in mediums as they appear in my imagination. This was a way to push me to do more and to have something that is all mine. Something I’ve nurtured and worked hard for. Something all my own. I’m working for myself, doing what I want. Rather than working for someone else and doing what they need me to do and waiting for someone else’s authority.
Five.
To build confidence in myself and my right to take up space. There are so many people (read: mediocre white men) out in the world taking up space and creating podcasts and other content that no one asked for with confidence. So why can’t I also take up space and confidently do what I want even though I don’t know what I’m doing? *mic drop* *confetti cannons* *gracefully falls into a crowd surf*
I also was and still am really curious about art as activism. Art as a way to connect with others. Art as a way to process my own feelings and what happens throughout the world and how they relate. I wanted a safe space for self expression and communal connection.
This will probably never make me $$ and I’m not aspiring to be the world’s best bubble letterer or go viral. I simply enjoy writing random words in kind of shit lettering that is very different from my usual handwriting (which is actually really nice). Art can simply be a hobby and things don’t have to look nice to have worth and to be shared. This is a space where I’m not really striving for anything other than joy.
Now that I am a couple of months into this process, I am starting to plan and research more, but the original view point remains true. I can make things with what I have available to me at this moment. It doesn’t have to be perfect. I could decide tomorrow to be done or go on for years and both and everything in between is cool and okay. I still don’t know what I’m doing but I’m really enjoying the process of figuring it out little by little with no reason to rush.
Such little planning had gone into this the day I launched it. I honestly just grabbed a scrap piece of paper, wrote 5 words, took a picture, and here we all are. Welcome.
A place for me to share words and random ramblings in the form of not so great bubble letters.
Clear paper, full pens, can’t lose.
(I've never seen Friday Night Lights, but that's for another time).
Comments